


Big Head Boy

by fictionalcandie



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Gratuitous Prattishness, Humor, Implied Relationships, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-07-19
Updated: 2009-07-19
Packaged: 2018-04-14 17:44:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4573833
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fictionalcandie/pseuds/fictionalcandie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Anyone who says they aren't surprised is a liar.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Big Head Boy

Lily Evans was in shock.

This couldn’t be happening. It _couldn’t_. They would have told her. They would have _had_ to tell her — certainly they would have had to tell her, right? She was… she was _Head Girl_ , for goodness sake, they _would_ have _told_ her. They definitely wouldn’t let this happen and then send her walking _right into it_ , completely unprepared.

Lounging on one of two banks of seats in the Heads’ compartment, the young man who’d been waiting for her smiled lazily, and ran a distracted hand through his hair. “Hullo,” he said, quite cheerfully. “I wouldn’t have figured _you_ to be the late one, Evans.”

In a kind of sick, desperate attempt to convince herself that she was seeing things, Lily’s gaze went immediately to the gleaming golden badge on the front of his school robes.

She squeezed her eyes closed.

It was still there when she opened them again.

She must have made some kind of noise — please, God, let the whimper have stayed in her mind — because his smile was mostly gone and he was suddenly peering at her with barely-there frown lines of concern all over his face, his eyebrows scrunched together over his glasses.

“Evans?” he repeated, rather warily, and swung his legs off the seats. He leaned a little closer. “You all right?”

“ _James Potter_ ,” she whispered, incredulous, and sat down so quickly he probably thought her knees had given out.

Hell, they probably _had_.

His crooked grin was back, though behind it he looked rather baffled and still concerned. “Wow, seriously, Evans?” he asked, with a chuckle; it was probably a temporarily poor grip on reality brought about by the shock, but for a second, she really did think it sounded forced.

Then he opened his mouth again.

“I don’t think I’ve ever had anyone actually almost _faint_ just because they saw me,” declared James, his grin widening slightly. “Except Sirius, of course, but that hardly counts.”

She stared at him. Well, _goggled_ would been rather more accurate.

“I must be losing my touch,” he added mournfully, and gave a really, really big sigh before slouching back onto his row of seats.

It took Lily almost three seconds before she realized that he was _teasing_.

 _He_ was actually _teasing her_ and looking _concerned_ , and he was the _bloody_ — this was so surreal, it was practically Apocalyptic. No doubt there were a number of other signs of the end, like pigs flying willy-nilly wherever they chose or cherubic blonde Anti-Christs running around after the four horsemen, only she must have missed them in the sheer _shock_ , because—

He had sat back up. In fact, he’d sat _all the way_ up and was leaning so far over that he might as well have been sitting next to her. The previous frown lines were back with a vengeance, nothing barely-there about them this time, and he really did look worried now.

His voice was soft, audibly uncertain. “Lily?”

That was when she began to hyperventilate.

* * *

Mary MacDonald was confused.

Her best friend had just come staggering back into the compartment, flushed and shaking. She kept muttering “This can’t be happening,” under her breath, too, and the fingers of her left hand were pressed against her right cheek as if she would be in pain otherwise.

“Lily?” Mary asked cautiously, putting down her copy of Witch Weekly.

Her friend’s head turned slightly, and green eyes met her own, rather dazedly.

“Er, how was the meeting?” she asked, thinking it was more likely to get an answer than ‘What the ruddy hell happened to _you_?’

Lily blinked. “Meeting?” she repeated.

Mary frowned. “Yeah, the one you just went to? With the other Head — who is he, anyway?”

To her surprise, her words drew a small whimper from Lily. “This can’t be happening,” the redhead whispered, _again_ , and she flopped limply onto a seat.

"Lily?" Her voice was blatantly worried now, but Mary couldn't help it, with Lily sitting there all un-Lily-like.

"I can't say it," Lily replied, hoarsely.

"What?" Mary frowned.

"I can't say it!” repeated Lily, with a little moan and some distressed head shaking.

"Why not?"

"You'd never believe me."

Mary scoffed. "Go on, tell me."

Lily sighed. "You really won't believe me," she cautioned.

"I can take it," laughingly. "Tell me!"

Lily told her.

Mary’s eyes widened and she shrieked. "Oh, you are bloody well kidding me!"

Lily shook her head. “No, he is.”

“But… how?”

“I don’t know!” wailed Lily, throwing up her free hand and waving it in the air. “I have absolutely _no_ idea!”

The girls stared at each other for several moments.

“But it’s _Potter_!” Mary protested eventually, shaking her head. “Why would _anyone_ — Who would _want_ him to— It’s _asking_ for disaster!”

Lily shrugged helplessly. “I _know_.”

* * *

Sirius Black was having a fabulous day.

He’d known it would be a good one, ever since James had received his letter — and the Head Boy badge, of course — but he hadn’t expected it to be _this_ good.

The reactions of the few on the platform who had noticed the badge were priceless, like the fourth year Slytherin who’d been so busy staring in disbelief at the front of James’s robes that she’d tripped over a trunk and nearly knocked Regulus over. Or Regulus, who — in angrily turning to see who’d run into him — had also caught the flash of gold on James’s chest, and had proceeded to turn gaping eyes repeatedly from James to his brother.

From what he’d heard Regulus muttering to himself, Sirius was pretty sure that everyone would think it was just a great joke. He was gleefully anticipating the moment the other students realised it was very much _not_.

Almost as soon as the train had left, James had gone off to his meeting with the Head Girl — Lily Evans, undoubtedly — and Sirius had lurked a few compartments away, excitedly waiting to pounce when they were finished.

The look on Lily’s face as they stumbled from the compartment had been _everything_ he’d hoped for — as if she’d just been run over by a horde of purple paisley hippogriffs, and then been told they were neon orange thestrals, instead. And James — James’d had the look of someone well pleased with himself and trying to hide it.

One of Sirius’s favourite expressions.

He’d bounded over to them, coming up behind James’s shoulder and resting his chin on it.

“Have a lovely meeting, Evans?” Sirius had asked brightly, with a wide grin.

The poor girl had just stared at him like he’d been speaking French. Which, of course, was possible, but Sirius had been fairly certain he hadn’t slipped. Moving from behind James, he’d turned his grin to the other boy.

“How’d it go?”

“Great,” his best friend had replied enthusiastically, with a smile at Lily’s still shell-shocked self. “Just great.”

“Fabulous,” Sirius had declared, throwing an arm around both their shoulders and beaming. “I’m so proud of you, children.”

Lily’s face had gone a little red then. “ _Black_ —”

Sirius had ignored her. “So proud!” he’d repeated, and promptly leaned in to plant a large, smacking kiss to her cheek.

James had retreated before he could receive the same treatment, giving Sirius a very stern look for Lily’s benefit, while his eyes gleamed behind his glasses. “Now, now, not in public, Padfoot,” while smoothing down the front of his robes, “Have to set an example you know.”

Sirius had nodded sagely, ignoring the way Lily’d made a sick sort of moaning noise. “Right. Forgot for a moment.”

“No harm done,” James had assured him. Then he turned a quick grin on Lily. “Well, Evans, we’d better be off. See you at the Feast!”

While Lily had made another one of her noises and nodded stiltedly, James and Sirius had swooped in one after the other and planted two more kisses on top of Sirius’s original one, before heading off down the train arm-in-arm.

Sirius had been especially pleased with the exasperated squeak that had followed them.

The start of term feast proved to be an excellent end to a _truly_ fabulous day.

“… and if our new students have any questions,” Dumbledore concluded his speech, beaming out across the House tables. “I encourage them to ask their House prefects, or our Head Girl and Boy — Lily Evans and James Potter, both of Gryffindor.”

There was a moment of silence, the first years shifting nervously and all the returning students gaping at the Headmaster. Even a few of the teachers had their mouths open in shock.

“He made Potter _Head Boy_?” someone from the far end of the Ravenclaw table whispered, voice coming out far too loudly in the silence of the Great Hall.

“ _Potter_?” a Slytherin spat incredulously. One seat over, the sneer on Severus Snape’s face intensified. “Really!? _That_ Potter?”

Several of the Hufflepuffs were exchanging concerned glances. “Has he gone _mad_?” one asked the others.

“ _Wicked_ ,” one of the Gryffindor fifth years breathed, turning in her seat to stare adoringly in the direction of the Marauders.

Almost everyone in the Hall followed suit, most with expressions of shock, and the Gryffindors with varying levels of awe.

James ruffled his hair and grinned.

Next to him, Sirius smirked. “This year is going to be _excellent_ ,” he declared loudly.

There was a smaller moment of silence.

Then everyone broke into a flurry of fervent, generally anxious whispering.

Sirius sat back, looking smug, and enjoyed his best friend being the center of a great deal of attention.

Incredulous panic was _so_ much fun.

**Author's Note:**

> This work can also be read [here on LJ](http://gailsauce.livejournal.com/60317.html) or [here on DW](http://gailsauce.dreamwidth.org/59849.html?style=site). Yes, that thing you thought was a Good Omens reference actually was.


End file.
